Fuck monkeys

Little hairy bastard man is a more accurate name than "monkey." I know this because earlier today one of these little hairy bastard men stole my drink from me. I'm down in mexico, chilling with fuckin Van Hagar and banging fourteen year olds [Editor's note: Scott, please remove this. It is illegal to have sex with fourteen year olds.{reply to editor: Fuck you, suit}]. So anyway, I'm fucking all these underage bitches, and drinking a mint julip that's 100% bourbon and fucking older than the girl who is slobberin on my hog, when I decide to put my drink down so I can finger this penguin's asshole. Then BAM, suddenly there's a fucking monkey stealing my drink and riding away on a racepig. And no, that's not a pig that's racist. It is a pig that used to race in someplace called Hondorous because apparently they is too poor for horse. horse race. But don't worry, I made that mistake about the racist pigs too. Oop!

Scott A. Stapp, monkeykiller, out!